- Do you need a sounding board to help you make authentic, risk-aware decisions in your kink life?
- To help you choose your next step in your BDSM journey of growth?
- To ensure you’re asking the right questions when you move and organize within community and negotiate with partners?
Kink coaching can be tailored to fit your needs: do you need support with authenticity and boundaries, dom coaching, sub coaching, switch lessons, or a general examination of your relationship with your kink, sex, or masturbatory life? You don’t have to pick one; any form of my coaching can meet you where you are, and prep you for where you want to go, helping ensure you can freak safely: from a place that’s sovereign and boundary-led, risk and trauma -informed, and confident in your desires.
- Ever wished you had someone who could help you unpack your relationship with your kinks?
- Are you frustrated with the intensity of shame and hesitation around your desires?
- Do you feel self-conscious because you’re worried your kinks say something about you?
Your fetishes and kinks can tell me a lot about you: the abstract concepts that speak to your sexuality, and your relationship with interpersonal concepts, control, and your shadow. My expertise encompasses sacred play as a way our subconscious and inner child communicate with us, and that allows me to look at the patterns in your play and relationships. With my guidance, you can re-negotiate with control and learn when to step on the gas or press the brakes.
- Are you curious to see if there’s a dominant side you have yet to unleash, but don’t know where to start?
- Is the concept of dominating another person in consensual kink daunting?
- Do you find that your inexperience with domination or kink keeps you from claiming the title of “dom” or “top” and starting your journey at all?
Perhaps you’ve felt there was a dominant inside you, just waiting to get out, but haven’t been able to locate them yet. Is your confidence lacking, or is it a struggle with vulnerability that claims you need to be ‘bulletproof’ before you can govern another? With over a decade in the field of domination privately and professionally, I offer dom coaching to anyone looking to delve into the mental aspects of the art, or hoping to find their most authentic dominant self.
Learn To Dom
Have you ever wondered about:
- How to plan elaborate scenes?
- How to tell what your submissive really wants?
- How to be vulnerable with your submissive and build boundaries for yourself?
- How to learn to effectively humiliate, degrade, or otherwise emotionally manipulate a submissive?
- Advice on building routines for your dynamic partner that realistically account for both of your needs?
- Ideas on brat taming, or someone to help you figure out where to begin planning a submissive or pet training routine?
Whether you’re a newbie trying to find your inner dom, a novice hoping to improve your power dynamic abilities, or a practiced dominant looking to learn more about psychological dominance, control, and the subconscious desires that fuel a submissive’s experience, dom coaching is one of my favorite specialties to offer. With over a decade in professional femdom, I can teach you more about a variety of kinks that can be played out in-person or over long distance, and can even support upcoming doms hoping to ply their trade on phonesex platforms like Niteflirt.
Sovereignty Coaching
The concept of personal sovereignty is rooted in the concept that every person has the right to be the exclusive authority and source of control in our decisions. Sovereignty revolves around every person’s right to determine and live by the beliefs, values, and choices that authentically resonate with us, without being dictated by external systems or social pressures.
Caroline Myss, internationally renowned speaker in human consciousness, health, and spirituality, defines it by saying, “Sovereignty begins with knowing who you are and taking full responsibility for your life.” Sovereignty is not about others being above or below us – it’s about making autonomous decisions that allow us to exist as the authority on ourselves.
If you don’t want to examine these concepts within a kink framework, that’s easy to accommodate! We can examine sovereignty without kink, which is perfect if you’ve spent a lot of your life unfulfilled, masked, codependent, or being a doormat. Sovereignty coaching can help you examine:
- Where do I self-abandon, sabotage, or betray my needs?
- How can I find, explore, and grow into my fully authentic self?
- What boundaries do I lack, what boundaries do I need, and why do I act in ways that don’t honor them?
Can I be sovereign and submissive?
Even if you consider yourself submissive in a D/s dynamic, your choice to submit to a dominant is a decision that should be made from a place of personal sovereignty: self-aware, boundary-led, autonomous, and authentic.
“I am the only one who can tell the story of my life and say what it means.”
Dorothy Allison, “Two or Three Things I Know For Sure”
Is personal sovereignty an individualist or anti-collectivist concept?
While some individualists do embrace an idea of personal sovereignty, sovereignty itself is not inherently anti-collectivist at all. Human interdependence is enhanced when we act from a place of personal sovereignty: By clearly articulating and enforcing our boundaries, caring for ourselves, and leaning into our authentic selves, values, desires, and needs, we create an environment that allows us to form communities based on cooperation and care that is accessible, rather than draining.
“Swapping parts and roles is not acting, but rather, emancipation from expectation.
Parquet Courts, “Total Football”
Collectivism and autonomy are not mutually exclusive.
Those who find discomfort in your goals of liberation will be issued no apology.”